THE MYTH OF MASCULINE STRUCTURE

Over the years, I have heard many people, teachers, coaches and guides, especially in the spiritual intimacy realm, speaking about how a huge part of the masculine - is within structure...

Sure, I would agree that yes, the most SUPERFICIAL and beginner aspect of the masculines development is indeed initiating some form of structure, organization and implementation. But this is just his stabilizer wheel. It’s not supposed to remain so tightly gripped to. 

I see many “men’s-work” people totally ruled and governed by a militant type structure. A structure so rigid, it allows for little life-force to be present. 

Structure - isn’t his godliness. 

It isn’t his king...Its his slave. 

Don’t get me wrong, there are healthy forms of integrated and balanced structure which is necessary to achieve the most basic human needs. For the sake clarity, this transmission is to do with the unhealthy version of structure. And how championed and over-leaned upon it has become in the male spiritual development arena.

THE HIERARCHY

Masculine structure has been extremely overhyped and misunderstood. Men confuse it for efficiency, and women confuse it for safety. 

Structure is the most basic form of a mans development. 

The next level up from structure, is aligned discipline. I say aligned, because so much of the discipline men and women put on themselves is atrociously detrimental to their health. Ideally, having the discipline being in alignment with your love of self would be of the highest support.

From discipline, brings us up to the next level; clarity - Which is also not the mountain top. But it is most certainly needed to get there. 

Before I share the highest form of the masculines development, I will say that one of the biggest rebuttles I get from people when I speak about the detriment of structure, is always something along the lines of : “Well if I don’t have structure and organization, how am I going to run my business or get anything done? How will I survive and thrive?”

My response to this type of question is basic at best, but I will share it anyway: 

That’s just a story you are telling yourself, and you are fighting to keep it. You are just afraid. Afraid that if you stop living by your structure, that life will somehow drop you, and you will be homeless on the street. That everything will fall a part. 

Sure, It’s a possibility, if that’s what’s supposed to be in your experience, then that’s what you’ll get. Either way, you will never be able to stop what’s meant to be. But what I will say is, If I manage to run/grow a successful business, see as many clients and students as I do, and still manage to remain on my own terms in life...divinely lazy - then I simply can’t believe your story. It’s simply not true. You are just too afraid to drop it. Too afraid to find another way. Because it most certainly exists. 

I don’t have structure. 

Actually, let me re-clarify that: I have the bare minimum amount of structure necessary in order to continue living my life on my own terms. The amount of structure which still allows my wildness and freedom to run the show.

So, maybe my response helps you, if you can relate with the initial complaint. Or maybe you just think I’m a self-righteous douchebag, who is idealistic and delusional. Either option is fine, and your conclusion will possibly expose the story which you have been living by. 

My highest commitment remains in honoring my nature, as an ode of gratitude to life.

For me, this bond has proved itself to be more important than anything else in life, love and business. I REFUSE to go against my truth, for anybody, and I truly feel in my deepest center that life has rewarded me greatly for my decisions. 

Ok, let’s circle back to the main point of this post, as I’m veering. It must be my lack of structure. 

*THE MOUNTAIN TOP*;

The highest form of the masculines work is not in structure, but in his ALERTNESS!

Alertness is his peak consciousness. 

He can live in peace and ease, BECAUSE of his alertness. 
He can live as a king, BECAUSE of his alertness. 
He can live on his own terms, BECAUSE of his alertness. 
He can lovingly fuck her open into cosmic orgasmic oblivion, BECAUSE of his alertness. 
And, he can do all of this while also serving & generating abundance...because of...you guessed it - ALERTNESS. 

Alertness - Is the masculines master-key. 

It’s In his PRECISE ALERTNESS, in every single morsel of each and every moment, which grants him a royal life. 

His consciousness & presence, fully engaged. Waiting. Watching. Responding to that which is immediate. Paying no mind to the rest. Ignoring the noise. Ignoring what simply doesn’t matter. 

The man(or woman) who has excessively planned, often spends his life in a tense anguish. Worrying profusely of when it all might go wrong. He lives life with the belief that everything is against him, and he must constantly scramble to stay alive and upright. This is a form of the unhealthy masculine patterning, and it has been disguised as the healthy masculine in many men’s work circles. 

The man of alertness, has arrived to this alertness due to his spiritual development - his conscious relationship with god. He lives life in a receptive awe, of how everything in this life converges to support him. This is his nourished feminine assisting his existence, riding his steed. 

A man of alertness is calm & relaxed, which is rested upon a foundational ferocity. He knows his darkness, and can call on it immediately, if necessary. 

He is tuned-in and connected intuitively - Ready and willing to draw his sword at any moment. But until that moment, he is at ease. Enjoying the beauty of life.

THE SHIFT

I know the difference between healthy and unhealthy structure in life personally, as In my earlier adult-infancy, I was one of the most structured, prepared, and organized man I knew. Yet I was a fool. A burnt-out fool. Who believed the hype. Over-worked to the bone. Compromised to the teeth. It almost killed me. 

In my relationships, I heard the women requesting my structure. So I gave it to them. And it was disastrous. 

It coddled her fear and childishness. It supported her in holding on to her past traumas, without ever learning to truly face the spontaneity of the moment, the uncertainty in life and in love. And it blocked me from ever truly meeting her in aliveness. 

I am deeply grateful for having experienced both levels of development. 

Arriving to a place of relying on my alertness, has been the most challenging and terrifying journey for me. But it has granted me a luscious life of abundance. It has taught me how to truly dance. 

In conclusion: 
A man who has made contact with the higher functionings of life, is a man who has dropped the attitude, the way, the plan. He moves through life absolutely unprepared, in waiting, in service - alert to each moment. Enforcing the bare minimum amount of structure needed in order to flourish vastly. 

His woman feels her mans ability to see, and she trusts in this. She trusts her kings ability to lead from his moment to moment communion with something greater than him. She feels his surrender to god. Which allows her to surrender and open so much more to him. More so than with any other man before him. (Most men want a woman’s surrender, without himself ever knowing surrender. This is unsafe for her.)

Through him, she is held deeply accountable, and must be willing to renounce and face all of her own fears and controlling tendencies. So she too can dance freely in life. 

She doesn’t need his structure. She needs his knowing - so firm that it splits her in 2. 

Brothers, level up!

Don’t believe the hype. 

We need you far more alert on this planet. Without the preconceived ideas, reliance on technique, and conditioned belief systems.

So, how does all of this apply to intimate relating? How does this apply to a man living from his godliness? How does he even start his process?...
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Much love,
Chris